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Terrell Johnson's avatar

I absolutely loved every single one of these, but especially #10: "The New Yorker kept right on going. The moral of the story: If your work doesn’t resonate with someone, that’s okay. Maybe they just wanted a tote bag." I needed to hear that today, actually!

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Caroline Cala Donofrio's avatar

Thank you, Terrell. May we all follow the New Yorker (although maybe not when it comes to that teeny tiny font...) and not take it personally!

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david roberts's avatar

That one hit me just right, too.

Caroline, why not Substack tote bags?

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Caroline Cala Donofrio's avatar

Good question. I’ve often thought tote bags would be a fun idea…

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Sara's avatar

I laughed out loud at that one for sure. <3

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Patty Barrett's avatar

Bookmarking this isn't enough. I'm printing it out and using it as wallpaper... once I find a printer.

Also, re: trolls. "Trolls mean you’re doing something interesting. Say, “thank you for your interest,” as you calmly move them to the trash bin."

I think there is a troll spectrum. I like to think I'm a bejeweled belly button troll who likes & comments & follows to be positive and praise people's interesting work. It's like... I'm still a little creepy, but a good creep? A creep for good?

On the other side you have the trash bin trolls with their bad attitudes and internal disgust.

ANNNNYWAYS, thanks for acknowledging the air holes in the troll box. Otherwise, I'd have notified the authorities.

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Maddie Burton's avatar

Came here to say the exact same thing re: the air holes in the troll box 😅

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Patty Barrett's avatar

Maddie & Patty are on the CASE!!

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Caroline Cala Donofrio's avatar

Hahaha I adore this (and both of you).

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Samantha Chesler's avatar

Lots of these spoke to me today. If we lump them all together they really say a similar and simple thing that is so hard for most of us to digest. Just be. Tune out the noise. Quieten the naysayers. Find your own little star and follow it. That’s what you do Caroline and you are generous enough to share your wisdom with us. I hope you feel better. We aren’t going anywhere:)

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Magical Memory Maryann Zabbia's avatar

Love this. Find your own little Star and follow it

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Sheila marie's avatar

I want to see a certain x president in an orange jumpsuit with “It’s not what you can get away with it’s what’s right” emblazoned on the back. No on the front. No on both sides so people see it coming and going. Here’s hoping it’s mostly going.

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Caroline Cala Donofrio's avatar

When I first read this, I saw “orange jumpsuit” as “orange president,” but technically that also works.

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Sheila marie's avatar

It actually does!

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Alaina's avatar

What a great list! As someone who doesn't like chocolate (I wish I did!) I need to remember 36 more often.

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Charles Torello's avatar

Outstanding words. Truly, there is deep wisdom behind them. Thanks for sharing.

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Caroline Cala Donofrio's avatar

Thank you very much.

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Miles Kim's avatar

"Remember the New Yorker"—love it

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Shanti's avatar

I'm on the brink of making a big career decision, and #28 is totally what I need to hear. I cried when I read it and I'm feeling so relieved. Thank you so much Caroline for sharing this ❤️🥺

Wishing you ease and joy in everything you do 🤗

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Madeline's avatar

I also resonated greatly with #28. I just came off of a rocky breakup with my ex-boyfriend, whose life is spiraling out of control. I had to quit being friends with him too because he was taking out his frustration on me and it was not my job to save him from his misery. I feel slightly guilty for leaving him, but reading this list reminded me that I am responsible for no one but myself. As a people-pleaser, this was hard for me to swallow.

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Jolene Handy's avatar

Love this, Caroline! And the one about being overwhelmed by the sight of unread New Yorkers (and everything else I want to read, including so many gorgeous Substacks) was so spot on!

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Alex de Lara's avatar

Loooved this one. So many gems on this list but I particularly love #1, #17 (Everyone is making it up as they go along), and #19: we can “always choose again.” Hang in there friend. Sending you love. ❤️

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Kris Jackson's avatar

Someone subscribed me to Better Homes & Gardens, and I feel SO guilty for not reading it. I’ll let 4 pile up and then make myself page through them and then recycle them. I don’t know how to unsubscribe!!

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Petra Khashoggi's avatar

Great list! Totally agree with #35

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Ella's avatar

Every single one of these was perfectly put. I'm happy to say many of these I've learned. But you distil it down so succinctly. I'd love these in a book on my bedside as reminders when I forget ❤️

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Abby Kastania's avatar

Wow. I felt like my younger self and my now self needed these kinds of reminders.

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Patrick Tennis's avatar

Fantastic reminders! I recently gave a best man speech containing a list of advices for the new marriage. These would have fit in perfectly!

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Leslie Forman's avatar

Love this list.

For #4 + #5 re: Mary Oliver, I've found that the audiobook Rare and Precious (essentially an audio anthology curated by a super fan) is an excellent one to give my 3am insomnia brain just enough stimulation.

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